Sunday, July 29, 2007
I really can’t complain ‘cause a guy never had it better. What more can you ask for than a pretty girlfriend who loves you?
Well, I’m sorry, but I felt like a failure. It wasn’t her. It was me. I wanted some sort of success. To be an artist, however laughable that might be to you.
Working as a children’s librarian just didn’t cut it for me. It’s the type of position that makes me question my masculinity. I refuse to be called ma’am. This isn’t my mission.
Please, selling out is dying. And I want to live forever. So, working for peanuts, I made it my idealistic goal to succeed. I set forth to create my break-through achievement.
Well, it wasn’t so much fun. In solitude. And I failed. No one liked it and it will remain unfinished. My advice: don’t dedicate yourself at the expense of others.
I want to apologize. I want to get out of my head.
Today I went for a walk and kept on going until my legs couldn’t carry me anymore. That’s no good.
Next time, I’ll do whatever I can to make it better. To hell with these weird fantasies. I love you and I love the world. I WANT TO SMILE.
I’ve fought monsters and worse
Inside my head
Demons of my own creation
You are the princess
Who tried to point me
In the right direction
unlocking the gate
You held the key
Old castle of my heart
Where I lurk in the mote
Trenching through muck
With the alligators
Banging on the stone wall
When you are high in the tower
There’s no one I could admire more
Just catching glimpses
Makes me want to struggle
To prove I’m worthy of
The King’s approval
I need to slay these dragons
For that, there are knights more valiant
Braver, stronger and more beautiful
But I shall try